Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Lessons Learned in 2014.....

As we were driving home from Chicago I starting thinking about 2015 and also what I have learned from 2014.  I was listening to the song “If today was your last day” by Nickelback and I started thinking about regrets, hopes, progress and success in 2014.  Success is defined differently in my eyes right now.  I am starting the new year with a new job opportunity.  That being said, I am making that change because I want to be true to myself.  I want to work for an organization that I believe in and I want to be able to make a difference in the lives of others.

With this blog post I want to share some of the things that I have learned in 2014.  Sometimes we grow through struggle.  The growth is so important however the struggle is less than desirable.  I am a work in progress as I go  through life dealing with disappointment, unfairness and grief.  In the end, I am STRONGER for it.

After 16 years working for an organization that I helped build up, I am saying goodbye.  The mission has changed.  The direction is not the way I believe we should be going and the goals are different. With that and other things in 2014 comes life lessons and many things learned.  

Some things I have learned in 2014.
  1. New opportunities create new excitement and a renewed spirit.
  2. Kindness is not something we should randomly do, it needs to be a lifestyle.
  3. Our health is not promised regardless of how we take care of ourselves.  
  4. Perception is just that and there is more than one side to a story.  Be willing to listen to it.
  5. Know who your “people” are.  Be willing to agree to disagree.
  6. Judge not.
  7. Grief is a process.  Each day can be better than the day before if we allow it.
  8. There is freedom in being transparent.
  9. Less is more.
  10. Your parent can be one of your best friends.
  11. Making memories is all that we have.  Make memories daily.  
  12. Enjoy the simple things.  A sunrise, a cloud, a sleeping child, the warmth of your spouse at your side.
  13. Smile at strangers and make eye contact with those who are broken (that means everyone).
  14. When one person says you are average and 50 think you are great, don’t focus on that one person or obsess over why they would think you were “just” average.
  15. Be better instead of bitter.  Holding on to hurt only hurts yourself.  Let it go.
  16. We can’t worry about what we can’t control.
  17. We can’t control the actions of our adult children but must love them unconditionally.
  17.  Live in the moment.  That is all we have.
  18.  Political agendas and favoritism is always going to overrule hard work and dedication.

I could go on but these are the ones that jumped to my conscience.  So for this blog, I challenge you to think about some things that you have learned in 2014.  Go ahead and get started.  Life is a journey and there is joy in that journey even through our tears.  Here is to new beginnings and new opportunities!  I am going to embrace them how about you?

If today was your last day lyrics

My best friend gave me the best advice
He said each day's a gift and not a given right
Leave no stone un-turned, leave your fears behind
And try to take the path less traveled by
That first step you take is the longest stride
If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had, if today was your last day?
What if, what if, if today was your last day?
Against the grain should be a way of life
What's worth the price is always worth the fight
Every second counts 'cause there's no second try
So live like you're never living twice
Don't take the free ride in your own life
What if, what if, if today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?
And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you're dreaming of?
Swear up and down to God above
That you'd finally fall in love if today was your last day?
If today was your last day
Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?
You know it's never too late to shoot for the stars
Regardless of who you are
So do whatever it takes
'Cause you can't rewind a moment in this life
Let nothing stand in your way
'Cause the hands of time are never on your side
If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?
And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you're dreaming of
Swear up and down to God above
That you'd finally fall in love
If today was your last day?





Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Suspend Judgement.....

As a wise person told me, there are three sides to every story "yours, mine and the truth."  When we see only one side of the story we only see our perception of the truth.  One thing I often teach, is that we need to be willing to suspend our judgement to listen to the other side of the story.

We base "our truth" on the experiences that we have or by the information that we hear from the other side of the story.

Recently there has been controversy over the Furgeson case.  Everyone has an opinion about this and most likely our opinion is based on what our experiences are.  If you relate more to the young man that was shot, that is based on your experiences.  If you relate more with the cop, that is based on your experiences as well.

This blog is about suspending judgement until we get both sides of the story.  My challenge to you is that before jumping to conclusions about a situation, consider what we just may not know.

A quote that I once heard is that "we don't know what we don't know."  The question is are we willing to find out?  Can we listen without taking things personally?  Can we listen without letting our views and experiences cloud our ability to suspend judgement.

We all have reasons as to why we do what we do, even if others do not understand why.  We may be willing to share, but is the other person willing to listen?

We live in a world with differences of opinions, differences in thought and differences in expectations.  That is what makes us beautiful.  Our differences make us beautiful.  However these differences can divide us.

We have a tendency to take things personally (we are human).  What if we lived in a world where we could truly "agree to disagree?"  Many times we say that we can agree to disagree, however do we truly believe it?  Our strong personal feelings and expectations of others can create a clouded view.  Our glasses can be so fogged up with our own perceptions that we are unwilling to even consider anything else.

When we can suspend judgement and listen to the other side of the story, that is where we can find peace and where we can love each other as we were called to do.

This is not to say that we abandon our beliefs or experiences.  No matter what we will have those beliefs and experiences.  I have a dear friend that shares different views on a few different topics.  I respect her thoughts and opinions.  We don't get emotionally charged about our differences.  Instead we focus on what we have in common.  What we have in common is so much more important than what we differ on.

Focus on your likeness with others instead of your differences.  I am challenging you to think about this during the week.