Today I start my blog off with your challenge. I challenge you to take every
day as a gift and nothing more. I
challenge you to find the importance of tradition. I will admit
that I have approached the holiday season with blah and sadness. I have
felt dread, fear, loneliness and anger. I saw others being festive and
cheerful and I wanted to shake them and sleep through the holidays.
For someone who usually finds so much joy in the every day and in the holiday
season, the excitement and joy just did not exist.
Loss and grief can do something to someone
that I never thought possible. You can lose your spirit, your will to
better your life and you can lose the joy of life.
On Thanksgiving Day evening after we had
our dinner at my sister's house, we came back to mom and dad's house and I said,
"What are we doing? Dad would want this house to be alive. He
would want traditions to continue and he would want family
together." Our decision to close the house up the month of December
turned in to more of, we have to carry on his tradition and make him proud.
PROUD.
One of the most important words that I
wanted my dad to be of me from the time I was a little girl.
Not long after that Thanksgiving evening a
friend sent me a special saying that I couldn't forget. The saying said:
"Christmas is a time of joy
But now without you Dad,
Memories surround us
And it's easy to be sad.
But knowing you'll be watching,
With a Father's gentle pride,
We'll celebrate the happiness
Those memories provide.
Your love is here to guide us
In everything we do,
I give thanks at Christmastime
In memory of you."
With this message from a friend and with
talking to my brother and sister on my dad’s birthday we decided to continue
our Christmas Eve celebration at mom and dad's for our family. This year
we counted at least 65 attendees. Along with 16 kids and Santa! We
continued to make memories to make my daddy proud of a tradition he re-kindled.
Was it hard? YES. Do I think
his spirit was with us? YES. Am I glad that we made new memories and
started new traditions? YES.
Finding joy in moments had meaning for me
this year. The pain was unbearable at times, but I smiled through
my tears and remembered "my Santa/my daddy." I treasure those
memories.
I challenge you to continue traditions,
start new ones and treasure every memory. We are given a gift of being
children, parents, siblings and friends. Only for a brief time is this
our role. The only thing that stays the same is that everything
changes.
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